Saturday, January 12, 2008

Three Temptations and an Ode

After Thursday's blunder with the cookies, I thought it would be wise to eliminate the temptations from within my grasp. I have the self-discipline of a sloth and cannot be trusted. Nay, can never be trusted.

First temptation: Food
My food obsession knows no limits.

I started in the pantry. GONE are the potato chips. GONE are items that have a longer shelf life than say 40 years - I figure those items can't be healthy if they would still be edible when I'm in a rest home.

Then, I went to the store and passed the "Crap and other Stuff" aisle and hung out in the produce section. Usually I dash through this area at warp speed knocking over little old ladies in my haste. I actually purchased things like asparagus and spinach. Me. I bought asparagus. Some things defy comprehension. Now I need to figure out how to cook it. I suppose dumping a vat of butter on the asparagus is bad, right?

No, seriously. Right?

Second temptation: Finding excuses NOT to go to the gym
I have a gym membership that is gathering dust. I haven't actually made it to the gym yet this year....but I'm thinking about it!! That is a step in the right direction. I also packed a gym bag. It's ready to go whenever a real surge of ambition rears it's ugly head. Who knows, it may happen next week. We'll see. Actually, I think I have to wash my hair next week...

Third temptation: Not using Darren's illegal copy of Photoshop
I revealed in longing and wistful tones that I would love to have Photoshop. He casually mentioned that he has an illegal copy in his room. My mind started scheming.... He is often not home. I am often home all alone in this house. No one would ever know if the copy just 'happened' to end up on our computer. Well, except for both of you readers who now know my secret. So, I guess in a way I have eliminated this temptation. Because if I suddenly have a really cute and clever blog picture and heading with an especially fancy font - you will know I used the illegal copy. I suppose I will be good. DANG IT!

So there you have it.

Here is a short poem I wrote to myself. I will use it for motivation.

Ode to Jode
You say you want to be fit.
Then stop eating junk food.

Just stop it!

Deep and moving, I know.

Oh, hey Bean... I didn't mention my cats once in this blog. Oh, oops. Well, since I just mentioned them - here is a new pic.

And that is all she wrote. OUT.